Thursday, 25 February 2016

Wyrds, Chuggers & Cross dressers From The 41st Millenium

After reading and rereading the excellent rulesset for Inquisimunda over at Yak Tribe I've decided to drop everything else and start painting up Imperial forces again! Anyone unfamiliar with Inquisimunda it's an updated and expanded version of Necromunda where you play the part of a group of do gooders (if there is such a thing in the grim darkness of the far future) or do badders. The forces are usually around 10 - 15 models and the choice of different gang types is huge. So anyhoo, I painted up the following preciouses over the last couple of weeks and will laboriously go into detail as to what I intend to use them for.

Confused Necron

As an avid collector of White Dwarf magazine I got this metal Necron about 17ish years ago. It was undercoated not long after then spent the following years languishing on my painting table. Finally got him done, ridiculous really as it was all drybrushing. Now as I never intend to purchase another Necron model he will henceforth be utilised as a killer cyborg or a Necron whose had a neural inhibitor connected to his brainhole so he follows his master around like an eager puppy, carrying, fetching and obliterating enemy fighters on command.



Another Wyrd, this time a beastmaster from Necromunda. I can't recall where I got this one as I don't have his beasts so it must be from Evilbay. A nice model that I intended to use in a *Wyrd Gathering gang. Until then he can just bloody well join some Inquisitor's retinue or Void Pirates.
Foxy Tailtrophy

 Sanctioned Psyker with Brainworm

When I started basing this bad boy I was going through one of my green stuff phases and had a sizeable lump with no idea what to do with it, hence this Psyker's little friend, the brainworm. I am not 100% what kind of rules I will give the owner of a brainworm but I'm imagining a pseudo psychic parasite that feeds off pychic energy that can give a once per game nullify of an enemy Psykers attack. 

Full Frontal

Look, it has a nearly human face!

 The Psyker In Yellow

This is another sanctioned mind wizard, I mut admit  really enjoyed painting these models. Both he and his mate above can easily form part of a Psyker laden Inquisitor cell, Rogue Trader expedition or part of a noble house doing naughty clandestine stuff either for or against the imperium.

Old Yeller

My Favourite Psycho Chaos Murderer

Fabius Bile is without doubt my favourite special character from any of my armies, the model is pretty tasty too! Going round experimenting on himself (and others) turning entire planets into murderous devolved savages whilst beefing them up with chaos steroids, just makes him the ideal evil genius to plague a campaign. With the Chirugeon Chaos Chiropractic machine on his back filling him with various daemonic fluids he can keep coming back from the dead in a most annoying (for his enemies at any rate) way.

Fabius Bile

 Abdul Goldberg

Anyone who has read the plot generator in the back of the Rogue Trader rulebook may remember the name of Abdul Goldberg. A criminal that seemed to be ever present thwarting other small time thugs. Well this model is my physical representation of him  on the tabletop. The model iteslf was one of those chopped up gems from Evilbay that seem to come up less and less frequently with ludicrous price tags (€15 for a goblin's foot). This was a headless, armless Colonel Schaeffer from Last Chancers fame. An Orlok stub gun arm (still my favourite looking GW weapon), a Gorkamorka knuckle duster type thing and a head from the evil heads selection from Maxmini. A nice yellow pair of pants MC Hammer style and a criminal kingpin is born!

Adbul (Can't touch This) Goldberg

More of the same

Transvestism In The 41st Millenium 

Technically this next model is not a transvestite.It was one of those models I bought during the early years of my GW **boycott that was supposed to be, I think a Necromunda bounty hunter. It then spent the next 18 years (or so) undercoated white, staring at me malevolently with those soulless eyes. Then comes Inquisimunda and a transgendered thug is born. Probably going to go into an  Inquisitors retinue but could just as easily sashay his/her way into Abdul Goldberg's crew of miscreants. 


Heretic Cawdor

Ever wondered what a Cawdor ganger looks like without his hood? Well wonder no longer! Part of the Colonel Shaeffer haul, a headless Cawdor Juve that very nearly got a skaven head on him was given a reprieve and stayed on the right side of the gene pool. Another Maxmini evil head. I figure him to be low level scum that will be in the front of the queue to receive bullets from enemies of the Imperium. Of course if he is a lapsed Cawdor he could be some sort of religious figurehead for the reformation of Redemption on the planet which could lead to the destruction of Necromunda in it's entirety. Of course he could just be some goon who has a hood phobia.

The New Martin Luther

Just Some Delaque

I like this model, entirely unless in Necromunda terms as a lascanon is probably the least cost efficient weapon in the cramped underhive, but for that fear factor a lascanon can't be beat. This lad has been on the painting table for a while and my main stumbling block is he three sets of raised lines on his forehead. they're either wires from his google glasses or thin strips of hair. Answers on a postcard please. I painted them red so they can be either.I will have to make a start on his mate with the heavy stubber and the Delaque gang is nearly complete.

You will take 2d6 wounds from me (if I hit of course).

Sci-Fi Bookkeeper

I bought this model to go in guilder gang I was ***planning to build but haven't gotten round to yet. At the moment he's looking like a ****chugger for the local branch of Lasguns For The Aged or Adopt-A-Pit-Fighter. Either way he reeks of objective when he gets placed on the table. Hopefully I can bring a report to this blog in the near future.

"Can I interest you in a time share in Hive Shitus?"
Thanks for reading.

*A group of Wyrds, the collective noun for Wyrds is I believe a gaggle.
** Didn't last long, as most other miniatures back then were shite.
***i plan an aweful lot of stuff - of which probably 20% gets started and of which 20% of that gets anywhere near finished and of that barely 20% of that is completed to my ultimate satisfacion.
****Chugger - charity mugger.

Thursday, 18 February 2016

Gratuitous Tits & Ass Post!

I was browsing the internet looking for things I can use for Necromunda and the like when I find the website Wargame Exclusive. Now I'm not sure who runs it but there are some pretty cool models on there. Mainly female ones with their tits out, but cool nontheless. Now as a fan of the 40K fluff I'm always glad to see new models set in that universe. The site has enough changes to the descriptions of the races in it to avoid C & C's from GW, but if the feminists find the site then it's gamer stereotype frenzy from them!

Female Guardswoman

This is a nice(ish) model of what I believe is a female Imperial Guardswoman. Looks like she's wearing suspenders and not much else. I can only imagine she is crouching down to obtain cover but I am sure that is not codex best operating practice for holding the lasgun. 
Female Guardswoman

Female Admech

This is a really nice model, big gun, mechanical bits and tits out. What? Tits out. I suppose because of all that trying to get closer to the machine and whatnot one must disassociate from bodily pleasures and all that and therefore all the other Adeptus Mechanicus employees don't get distracted and stare at her jubblies all day. I personally think they should be not so impossibly pert. unless of course they are in fact grenade launchers. That would be cool.
Admech Boobies

Female Witch hunter

At least the Inquisition have a sense of decorum! A push up bra top is the order of the day when hunting down heretics and mutants. Of course looking sexy is also a good way to discourage slack jawed yokels from becoming members of dirty Slaanesh cults. That is presumably the plan anyway. 
Madonna The Witch Hunter

Repentia Girls

The two faux Sisters of Battle Repentia troops are pretty cool models the first one nonchalantly holding a fully loaded chainsword. she can barely keep herself in her bra when she's at ease so when she starts flailing around with that big weapon, who knows what will occur? 

The second one is presumably called Sister Forgetfulness as she has clearly forgotten adequate footwear and a top to keep the chill off. I'm not sure what her sins were but if the management of the Adeptus Sorroritas allow that as a soldiers uniform then the whole organization seems nothing more than a burlesque show!

Female Chaos Renegade

To be honest, with Slaanesh and the all round nastiness of chaos in general I thought this model a bit tame. Yes, it has demonic claws copping a feel of pert chaos norks but it is no more risque than any of the previous models. I like the big piranha type gun too. probably should have looked like a dildo though. 
Chaos Bitty

Dark Eldar Head Holding Bint

Virtually nude but as Eldar are virtually the same as human is not weird right? Another very nice model but it's huge base makes it look impractical for table top games. It's also hard to tell what kind of head she is holding. Maybe it's a zombie apocalypse in the 41st millenium!
Dirty Filthy Eldar!

Naked Tau!

Yes that's what it was called (or to be exact naked Alien in the guise of Tau). I looked at some of the other angles and yes, her alien buttocks are free. What she is actually doing with/at her gun is unclear. What is pretty clear to me is she's a rude little alien running round strange planet killing innocent people!

Bold Girl, er Xenos.

Necron Gurls

These are just odd. Necrons (or whatever they are called in Wargame Exclusive world) are just some robots with big awkward weapons and yes, boobies. Admittedly metal boobies that can hurt the unwary but boobies all the same. i,m not a big fan of Necrons in the non titillating GW universe and I'm not a fan of these either. 

Metal Boobies

Vroom Vroom!

Now to the best things on the site. A selection of rather tasty gothic vehicles for me to use in my Inquisimunda games. I really like them but they're €40 a pop. There is a buy them all for €150 type deal but even I suspect I can't justify spending that on a game I play occasionally. On the other hand, if I build up my Genestealer Cult army then they would make some rather sexy coven limousines.  

Buy me these!

So I'm quietly trying to convince myself I don't want to paint more naked flesh, but I'm it's hard. the main stumbling block is the excessive cost. so until those six numbers come up, don't expect much naked boob, alien or otherwise on this blog.

Thanks for reading.

Monday, 1 February 2016

We Am Groot!

So I managed to cross some more models off of my bare lead pile and into my coloured in area. As is my wont I like to have a variety of reasons/game systems. Here are some Treekin from games workshop. As it seems WFB is now a dead duck, I am henceforth reassigning them as Forest Shamblers for Kings of War. I have also decided that they could be Agri-world gribbleys that come out of forests and batter fairly innocent farmers to death as per  Rogue Trader scenarios. Mainly, of course I will be using them as anvils (as much as you can have them) in Kings of War for both my Elven and Forces of Nature armies.

Astute obsevers may notice that the first two painted tree humanoids are painted differently and based in another stylee. This is because I got them from a mate in England who had already painted 2. Hopefully they are not way better than the remaining  10 but I suspect they probably are. My only shred of consolation is these bases don't fit in with the rest of my army so they are the odd ones out!

So anyway back to the grindstone I suppose.